Growers and Grocers

My kids like toaster pastries for the same reasons I almost never buy them: they’re ultrasweet, smeared (and sometimes filled) with sugary frosting, and although they don’t remotely resemble anything like an actual “pastry,” they’re weirdly addictive. Most trips to the grocery store include a pass through the seemingly ever-expanding toaster-pastry aisle and a brief, occasionally heated, dialogue that always begins, “Mom, can we get . . .” and ends with “You’re so mean.”  (Their words, not mine.) A couple of weeks ago, however, things turned out a bit differently at the supermarket where we shop for groceries.

Rolling my eyes at the close of the weekly “mean” invective, something caught in my peripheral vision. Three modest little red and brown boxes in a sea of splashy blue and yellow. I stepped closer to investigate. “Nature’s Path Organic Frosted Toaster Pastries,” I read off one box, which was well placed in terms of shelf space, at eye level. Hmmm. The kids wanted toaster pastries? Fine! Let them eat toaster pastries. Organic, zero-trans-fat, whole-grain, real-fruit toaster pastries! Sure, they probably wouldn’t taste that much different from the box they came packaged in, but whatever. At least these tarts had some protein and a bit of fiber, not to mention a good dose of iron. I perused the flavor options, selected one, hid it under a bag of brown sugar and a package of coffee filters, and rounded the corner.

“Hey, who wants a ‘Pop-Tart’?” I said, deceptively misapplying the brand name the following morning. I wasn’t trying to deceive, really, I just knew I wasn’t going to sell a teenage boy on organic toaster pastry.  “Cool, what flavor?” he asked. I checked the box. “Cherry . . . Pomegran–ate.” “Uh, Cherry Pomegranate? Is it Pop-Tart brand?” No joking, he really asked. “No, uh, actually, I thought we’d try something new. A different brand.” And then, before he could probe any further, I opened the package and chucked a couple of organic toaster pastries into the toaster oven.

My daughter eyed me speculatively. “Can I see the box?” “Nope,” I answered, shoving it back on top of the fridge. “Well, are they frosted?” I peered into the toaster oven. “Yup.” She shrugged, apparently satisfied, and carried her juice to the table.

After a few seconds, the sweetly compelling aroma typical of toaster pastries began to waft out of the toaster oven. The knob popped up and they were done. I used a wooden spoon to ease them out and onto plates, where I finally got a good look at those babies. I must say, they were pretty fine. Somewhat plumper than the usual toaster pastry, they were covered in an even layer of pink frosting. I set them down in front of the kids, waited for chewing to commence, then asked, “So?” “S’good,” my son pronounced around a mouthful of organic fruit filling and whole-grain pastry. “Very good,” seconded my daughter, “tastes like real fruit!” “Can I have another?” my son asked. And the next day, and the next day. The box was quickly gone, evidence that their enthusiasm was genuine, and not just a product of “Hey, we got Mom to give in and buy something we asked for — kind of.”

To date, we’ve tried the Cherry Pomegran[ate], Brown Sugar Maple Cinnamon Frosted, and Strawberry varieties, all of which were greeted with equally appreciative reviews. And I had to hide a smug smile last week when we ambled down that old familiar aisle, and my son said, “Hey, Mom, can we get some organic toaster pastries?” No joking.

Image from Nature’s Path.